Curly Hair: My Conditioning Products

May 28, 2022

I have two products that I use for conditioning: Adwoa Blue Tansy Reparative Conditioner is my go-to at the moment, but I also have Shea Moisture's Raw Shea Butter Deep Moisturizing Conditioner with Sea Kelp & Argan Oil -- though the one I currently have is the leave-in conditioner. 

I like to be able to alternate between the two when I notice that my hair may be a little brittle from too much protein from the Adwoa one, I will use the Shea Moisture one for a little bit. Neither of these products have coconut or aloe vera in them, and I like that they are the source of protein for my hair as none of the other products that I use have any protein in them. 

I have learned that though my hair needs it, I do have to be careful about how much protein it gets, and it has been a difficult balance to figure out. This does get easier over time as you get to know your hair better after being on your curly hair journey for a little while.


Behind the Art: My First Wish

May 21, 2022

My First Wish art print

This little drawing was created many years ago when my son was still a baby. The inspiration came from a book that I would read to him called You Are My I Love You by Maryann K. Cusimano. There is one line in the book that I absolutely love that says: "I am your dandelion, you are my first wish" 

I love the book for all of it's beautiful, yet simple, ideas of expressing your love to your child, but also explaining the relationship between parent and child in such deep phrases. Even as I'm writing this, there are echoes of the lines in my head. I love how a book can sit with you like that.


Weight Update: A Reflection on the Past

May 07, 2022

As I have wandered the new leg of this path, I have looked back at the blog posts that I made during the beginning, and realised how toxic they are. I know that the world has started to change in how we talk about our bodies, and are trying to change in how we look at the bodies of others, but that does not negate the way that I talked about myself throughout my blog posts, and quite possibly made others feel while they were reading them. 

I apologize to anyone that felt lesser than, or bad about themselves while having to read about me complaining about being thin my entire life. This is not an apology related to anyone holding me accountable for anything that I have said or done; it's an apology related to what I have made myself aware of in the things that I have written, and the privilege that I have always had because of my body shape and size. It is not the kind of person that I want to be moving forward, and I vow to do better. I will be keeping the old posts up, though, as I don't like the feeling of erasing what I have said.

Somewhere along the path of my journey I started to care less about weight loss, and more about building a stronger body. As my weight increased, I had to come to terms with the fact that I was not going to weigh 125lbs ever again, and be a healthy person. Part of what has helped me is very rarely, stepping on the scale, and trusting what the fit of my clothes were telling me instead.

My goals at this point involve preparing my body for the aging process, and making sure that I am not doing things that are going to harm me in the long run. Physical Therapy has been an important part of my journey the past couple of years as I have learned how to adjust what I am doing based on when my body tells me there is a problem that needs to be fixed. 

I feel like I am the strongest I have ever been, and that helps make me feel really confident in myself. I don't know where the future will take this body of mine, but I hope that I can keep it going to be able to enjoy the special moments that occur throughout life.

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