The Shop: Empathy Cards

November 03, 2018


Earlier this year, I made a birthday card for a friend that is not a fan of physical contact. We had a good laugh over it, but it wasn't until a conversation that I had with a visitor at my table during a spring market that I realised it could be a legitimate thing that some people might appreciate. 

I had just made some new sympathy cards (that haven't been released into the shop yet) and the visitor mentioned that she did not like the way sympathy cards are worded. She said that when her dad died, people would say things like "It's going to be okay" or "Feel better, soon" and all she felt was anger and sadness. She got tired of people giving her these cards that didn't acknowledge those feelings -- just a little band-aid on her emotions. It got me thinking, and I decided that I really wanted to recognise those emotions.

I started with the "it's okay to feel..." card. It is a phrase that I use with the children that I work with, because it really is okay to feel sad or angry...it's what you do with those emotions (ie. hitting people vs. finding a space for yourself). It initially ended with something like "just know that I'm here for you", but I decided that the card isn't about the person sending it. It's about the person receiving it, and it wasn't fair to add that little bit at the end. I mean, if the person sending it wants to add that little bit inside the card, they can. You know your friends and family better than I do.

I created the Christmas card about a month ago while a friend has been going through a rough patch after the loss of someone very close to her. The first anniversary is around the holidays, and I wanted to support the fact that -- although I love the season very much myself -- there are a lot of people out there that don't feel the same way as me because of loss, bad memories, etc. I had also intended to add something else at the bottom, but it felt too peppy, and like "yeah, it sucks, but cheer up, yo!" Again, that's not my place, and every card is blank to add an extra bit of sentiment if you wish.

Do you remember that scene in Inside Out when Bing Bong was sad and Joy was just trying to pump him up, but he continued crying until Sadness sat down and recognised his feelings and made him feel it was okay to be sad? Not everyone needs a little pep-talk after going through the emotionally draining things that life throws our way. Sometimes people just need someone to recognise how they might be feeling and feel their presence while they're sad. It's my hope that these cards will do a little bit of that.




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